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Sundries
...a sweatshop of moxie

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Personality

A small post, just to chew on, until I get back in the saddle.

Wednesday was a funny day. Part frustrating, part boring, part nervous.

Ever since I found out that nutter, President Ahmanejjad of Iran had announced his country had enriched uranium at last, I've been rather edgy and out-of-sorts (what, don't tell me I was the only one here?).

Like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, you know.

So, since a neighbour-friend of mine has lost her father recently, I took her out to a restaurant, just a few steps away from our condo.

I frequently go there, just to people-watch, and have a delicious meal, but to my astonishment, she had never been.

All throughout the meal, she exhibited the kind of nervy jumpiness, I felt inside -- only the cause of my unease, you already heard about above.

At the end of the evening together, she turned around, and half-whispered,

"You know, I don't feel I belong here. It's too fancy."

"Really? I think it's just perfect. Lots of good-looking people, good food, and a great location."

"Yeah. I'm glad I came. But whenever I come to places like this, I feel like it's too good for me."

I didn't say much, just smiled, so as to not to prolong any kind of embarrasment her admission might've caused her.

But you know, her words have stayed with me all night, until finally, I have written it down here.

I just want to say one thing, if on the off-chance, whoever should be reading this, happens to think the way this lady does.

Don't ever, ever feel something is too good for you.

That's just messed up.

There isn't a person alive who hasn't felt awkward in social situations, or coming into a room full of strangers, or that people are whispering about the get-up you're in.

That's normal.

For all my enormous ego, and by now, you know how huge it is -- I have felt that many times.

But by gum, I've never felt anything is too good for me, or that I'm not worthy of a special treat, or to go to an elegant eatery, because somehow, it's not my "crowd".

Screw that.

Enter like you own the place, look the snooty maitre in the eye, and speak up in a firm voice:

"Table for 1/2/3, please."

...and sit down and enjoy everything good life has to offer you.

Others do. You shouldn't? Why? What makes them so special -- money, looks, breeding?

Give me a break.

What makes people special is what has always made people special:

Personality.

Nietzsche said that "Character is destiny".

But I'll tell you:

Nothing beats a good personality, that knows how to use that character, to spit in destiny's eye.

16 Comments:

  • I didn't want to ruin the last sentence, which evokes so much of what I feel about in life, with a postscript...

    ...but I'd just like to add two things to the post:

    When we had parted and entered our respective homes, a few minutes later I get a cell call.

    It's my friend, thanking me not only for a nice evening...but more surprisingly, and happily, for "showing me I shouldn't be scared of life."

    All you can say to something like that is, "my pleasure, sweetie", but believe me, it made me feel pretty fine.

    And also, she thanked me for having made her and the waiter laugh, when he set down our two apple strudels in front of us -- and I looked down at it longingly and silently, and said,

    "I wish I knew how to quit you."

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Thu Apr 13, 03:49:00 am GMT-4  

  • "I wish I knew how to quit you."

    I've been thinking this about your blog since I started reading it, Vic.

    Damn you and your nudie pics ;-)

    By Blogger Kullrad, at Thu Apr 13, 04:53:00 am GMT-4  

  • Ah, the strudel love that dare not speak its name...we've all been there, surely!

    Don't forget to post/pose in your red frock come Easter!

    Verification word: "xbarddsy" This would be writing a somewhat pornish version of Lear, i.e., "King Leer."

    By Blogger Ron, at Thu Apr 13, 08:21:00 am GMT-4  

  • More powerful writing brought to us by Victoria! The feelings you so aptly describe are fairly common and your advice can help many. As you ponder your future, maybe a psychologist??

    By Blogger Jose Aguirre, at Thu Apr 13, 09:27:00 am GMT-4  

  • I've often felt uncomfy in some places - mostly because my clothes are not up-to-snuff, or something on that order - but never because I don't belong. Granted, I would not enter a neighborhood bar in Liberty City. That's just suicide for an Irish-type white guy. But feel undeserving of a good time? Or a fine meal? Or great entertainment? PTah!

    Nonsense! Have a friggin' blast! LOL

    Thanks, Victoria.

    By Blogger benning, at Thu Apr 13, 01:24:00 pm GMT-4  

  • Okay.
    What about being able to provide "good" to someone else?

    By Blogger Paul, at Thu Apr 13, 01:52:00 pm GMT-4  

  • re: your post

    Amen, sister-friend!

    By Blogger Ruth Anne Adams, at Fri Apr 14, 01:38:00 pm GMT-4  

  • By the way, Victoria, here's hoping your Easter was a fine one!

    *Hugs!*

    By Blogger benning, at Sun Apr 16, 10:34:00 pm GMT-4  

  • Victoria, donde estas???

    By Blogger Jose Aguirre, at Mon Apr 17, 10:19:00 am GMT-4  

  • Seems like her cable company took the weekend off. She doesn't have any cable or internet access but is hoping to be back today or tomorrow.

    Vicky hopes everyone had a Happy Easter!

    By Blogger Renato, at Mon Apr 17, 12:09:00 pm GMT-4  

  • I've been thinking this about your blog since I started reading it, Vic.

    Hey Kully! I so miss you and the lager louts at Youksef.

    Mind you, you'll never get me to admit that.

    I'll be back in no time at all.

    Famous last words...

    Damn you and your nudie pics ;-)

    They are the reedy dance of the snake charmer.

    Once seen, never forget, and hooked forever.

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:33:00 pm GMT-4  

  • Ah, the strudel love that dare not speak its name...we've all been there, surely!

    I believe Oscar used those very words to Lord Bosie, just before they took a bite of the forbidden apple strudel.

    Don't forget to post/pose in your red frock come Easter!

    Well, actually, I wore a very bland, executive, Laura Bush-like beige pantsuit.

    Although I did wear red earrings with that. ;)

    Verification word: "xbarddsy" This would be writing a somewhat pornish version of Lear, i.e., "King Leer."

    "Oh, Cordelia. (moan) How dost make my scepter grow."

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:35:00 pm GMT-4  

  • Very apt verification.

    Dipso.

    LOL. ;)

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:35:00 pm GMT-4  

  • More powerful writing brought to us by Victoria! The feelings you so aptly describe are fairly common and your advice can help many. As you ponder your future, maybe a psychologist??

    Oh my dear, nunca...

    I already have a shrink in the home, and though I'm batty, perhaps, she's just nuts.

    Nice nuts, but still.

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:36:00 pm GMT-4  

  • I've often felt uncomfy in some places - mostly because my clothes are not up-to-snuff, or something on that order - but never because I don't belong. Granted, I would not enter a neighborhood bar in Liberty City. That's just suicide for an Irish-type white guy. But feel undeserving of a good time? Or a fine meal? Or great entertainment? PTah!

    Exactly.

    This lady gave me a wonderful book of proverbs this Sunday, as a thank you gift for Easter.

    I do believe modesty and humility are stressed as Christian virtues, but why dump on yourself either, you know?

    Nonsense! Have a friggin' blast! LOL

    Thanks, Victoria.


    You too, Benning!

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:39:00 pm GMT-4  

  • Just in the interests of brevity from now on:

    Ruth Anne Adams said...

    re: your post

    Amen, sister-friend!


    Thank you, Ruth Anne.

    How did you spend your Easter, and I hope your Annie is doing better. :)

    benning76
    benning76 said...

    By the way, Victoria, here's hoping your Easter was a fine one!


    The very best to you, still, post-Easter, Benning!

    Jose Aguirre said...

    Victoria, donde estas???


    Cono! Es que mis providers son los mayores cabrones, Jose. No sabes cuanto.

    Pero ya estoy de vuelta.

    Feliz Pascua, Baby! ;)

    Cheers,
    Victoria

    By Blogger vbspurs, at Mon Apr 17, 08:42:00 pm GMT-4  

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