Thank You, Massachusett(e)s

At 11:40 PM EST on 19 January, almost two hours after the losing Democratic candidate for Senator from Massachusetts, Martha Coakley, gave her concession speech, this is how the two most prominent Bostonian newspapers' front-pages looked like.

BOSTON GLOBE




BOSTON HERALD




Nope. No sore losers here. Just media, the bitter clingers of hate.

Congratulations, Senator-Elect Brown!

The Football Arrives

I did not know the briefcase containing the nuclear codes had to follow the President even to the State of the Union address. Here it is, carried by an unnamed military aide, arriving at Statuary Hall.



Thanks to Wikipedia, we learn the following about the so-called "football":

The case itself is a metallic, possibly bullet-resistant, modified Zero Halliburton briefcase which is carried inside a black leather "jacket." The entire package weighs approximately 40 pounds (18 kg). A small antenna, presumably for the SATCOM radio, protrudes from the bag near the handle. A common misconception is that the football is handcuffed to its carrier. Rather, a black cable is employed that loops around the handle of the bag and the wrist of the aide.

That's a sobering thought. Perhaps much more reassuring than also learning via Wiki of something that happened back when, to President Jimmy Carter.

"Jimmy Carter once left nuclear launch codes in his suit when it was sent in for dry cleaning."

Never mind "ineffectual". Try incompetent.

Who Said 'Oh God' Just Before Jindal's Speech

Given that Governor Bobby Jindal gave a most lacklustre rebuttal speech, I want to know if the person who is audibly muttering, "Oh God" can read palms too.

He's obviously a fortune teller.



(Via Allahpundit)

Incidentally, if Bobby Jindal were black and not brown (as Juan Williams of Fox constantly likes to point out that he is) and I were a Democrat who loves to read these things into every moment, I would say what Olbermann - or whomever - said, has a racist tinge to it.

Too bad no one watches MSNBC else people would be justifiably outraged.

ADDED: Just in case anyone thinks the 'Oh God' was not about Jindal, I say nuts. Check out the inside laugh by an MSNBCer in the studio, just after the dismissive phrase.

Hold The Pepperoni

I am not too keen on the ACLU, but they certainly show us how pizza-ordering might be in the future.

CLICK HERE.

Dame Stella Rimington recently said that the British government have turned the island-nation into a security fortress since she was head of MI-5. It starts incrementally, with the best of intentions, CCTV protecting the populace from thugs, national ID cards to effectively mete out bureaucratic goodies, etc. etc. but it always starts. More importantly, it never ends.

Jay-Z, Your Car Is Ready

We just had the Boat Show in Miami Beach last week, but the one I look forward to is the Auto Show later this year.

I just better not see this Mercedes-Benz SL600 there, at least as it appeared in the Tokyo Auto Show in January. It's customised with over 300,000 Swarovski crystals.



Ugh, hideous ratty paste job. I'm surprised they didn't use a Be-Dazzler.

The Extinction Of The Republican Party

The Democratic Underground forum didn't think the post suggesting that the Republican Party be "eliminated" was too outré for them -- free speech giving birth to another kind of death wish, presumably.

Thus encouraged, their collaborators tried to outdo each other in hatred for their political counterparts.

However, one gentle soul wrote a poem capturing his feelings instead.

From: Mike Malloy: The Republican Party needs to be eliminated.

POETIC EXTINCTION...desperate , grasping
barely holding....unexplained convulsions of logic
....Lashing out fierce screams of blame...........
........thinking of survival, Wailing Flailing.....

lying dealing death to survive
Screams..... Pain.....hate....agony

Fear, oh yes FEAR

Eating one's own, you know that kind of Fear
......The fear of nightmares.....
Camouflage it....hide behind it....meta morph it

puffing plumage...raising hackles... loudly barking
..changing colors...altering strategies ..

smokescreens of stench

hungry predators...following the trail...searching

weakened hiding running Scared
hoping hoping predators circling
focused dedicated hungry
backed into a corner

Cowering Sniveling Crying

THE EXTINCTION OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY:

by Proud Patriot

(...smokescreens of stench. I have to remember that)

I think it's good that they're not hiding their inner dictator anymore. It feels cleaner.

UPDATED: Of course, with doctored videos via HuffPo, you can be forgiven for thinking the other side is nuts.

This is the original saved video which Huffington Post already retracted.



I think that could be the nail in their reputation coffin. What little they had to begin with.

Coke Adds Style

Introducing the new limited line of Diet Coke, as designed by Nathalie Rykiel (Sonia's little girl).



Wait, aren't horizontal stripes fattening?

Because Every Monday 4

Should start out with a laugh.



...a tie-in to my political yearbook photos, as according to a few sites, this is these crazy kids' high school yearbook photo. Yeah right. There isn't one school in the land that would allow this to be printed in their yearbook, even Barbizon.

And also, doesn't she know that he's gay?

Where are you NOW?

Tell me, where is the National Organisation For Women today as a woman in Buffalo, New York lies dead, BEHEADED, by her husband?

Silence, utter silence.

Not a word to condemn this most brutal act of violence against a woman's person -- perhaps the most unforgiveable moment of cowardice I have ever seen by feminist groups and leaders in my entire life in the West.

Look closely at this woman, standing next to her husband in "better times", who eventually killed her (I wonder just good the times were under the surface). Her name was Aasiya Hassan.



This is the face of your friend next door: an intelligent, well-dressed, modern woman like any other. Her death should be covered and spoken about with as much alacrity as Nicole Brown Simpson, another victim of a senseless slaughter with overtones of domestic violence.

I suppose NOW's front page at the time of writing says it all:



Singer Rihanna's assault consisted of a despicable battering by her boyfriend, leaving her with a swollen face, and she gets first mention. Aasiya Hassan's HEAD was severed off her ENTIRE body by her husband for daring to request a divorce, and is this worthy of comment by NOW? No.

My God, what is wrong with these people?

I'm sick and tired of these organisations and groups who adhere to a purely liberal ideological line, using women as their fulcrum, championing and ignoring women according to their whims.

All because they are scared witless that if they wade into anything Islamic, the violence meted out to the late Mrs. Hassan will somehow be visited on their person.

This is America. You have freedom of speech, and your political credo commands you to defend the most vulnerable amongst us, which most certainly includes women who are victims of oppressive husbands.

Speak up. Speak loudly. Make sure it doesn't happen to another woman again in America!

(...crickets)

Boris Johnson Gets Wikijacked

There is a fine old tradition on Wikipedia of altering entries with every intent to either amuse or fraudulently claim something about the subject at hand. To be expected, given that it's user-generated content -- this allows for the modern equivalent of the old Chinese whisper campaign and general hijinks.

Anonymity just seems to bring out the worst in humans, alas.

Maybe it's my rotten luck, or maybe it's far more common than I imagine it to be (who controls these things?), but often when I'm looking up a conservative politician or famous figure, their entry has just had some funny business done to it.

I call this phenomenon Wikijacking.

In the past, I have been around at the right time for Margaret Thatcher's reputed date of death. Let's not forget the time I posted on Benedict XVI's entry reflecting his reputedly unusual method of election (which Dan Brown should call "Secrets of the Gay Opus Dei Conclave" and make another fortune).

And now, Boris Johnson joins this distinguished list of conservatives who some people simply cannot keep from altering with their dirty typing paws.

Behold, Boris Johnson's Wikipedia entry, of a few moments ago!



Lovely.

Can you imagine if some wag uploaded a photo of Barack Obama like that? My dears, we'd never hear the end of it.

But for the wispy, blond-haired toff Mayor of London, well, he's just fair-game, isn't he?

Actually, knowing Boris as we all do, he'd probably be the first to laugh. I too laughed. Similarly, I am not suggesting someone SHOULD put up a photo of President Obama in such a guise. Only the terminally obtuse would think that.

What I am suggesting is that conservatives are quite often the targets of monkey business, err, so to speak, done to their entries on Wikipedia.

Furthermore, if an exactly similar entry was fudged by someone about say, Fidel Castro's date of death, or putting up a gorilla photo on President Barack Obama's Wiki entry -- that we'd never hear the last of those "hateful, racist conservatives" and their appalling deceitful behaviour.

See, it's not the fact of Wikijacking that bothers me, though as an historian I confess it rather does. It's the double-standard associated with it.

No worries though.

I'll keep posting on this activity so long as I catch it and, as the saying goes, shame the devil whilst I'm at it.

Extra

POPE BENEDICT'S WIKIJACKED ENTRY




MARGARET THATCHER'S WIKIJACKED ENTRY





UPDATE: As of 13:24, almost 20 minutes after I first noticed it, the ape pic is still up. LATER: 13:32...finally rectified.

ADDED: What brought me to Wiki BoJo? Simple, I was watching a BBC series called "Who do you think you are?" -- a genealogical programme which shows famous people's attempts to locate their ancestors.

As everyone knows, Boris is particularly cosmopolitan, being the descendant of a journalist/politician in Turkey, who was executed for daring to oppose their beloved talismanic President, Mustafa Kemal. The programme had just gotten to the part where he uncovered that his great-great-grandmother was the illegitimate daughter of Prince Paul of Württemberg when I said, "Aha, interesting. I think that is Queen Mary's ancestor, wonder if it's the same chap. Maybe Wikipedia has more information?".

The rest, as they say, is bingo what's my name-o.

I'm about to watch the Jerry Springer episode, though you'll be happy to know his Wikipedia entry is virgin. Democratic ex-mayor of Cincinnati, don't you know.

Hey Viejo Chocho -- It's Called HEBREW

Immanuel or Emmanuel or Imanu'el (Hebrew עִמָּנוּאֵל "God [is] with us" consists of two Hebrew words: אֵל (’El, meaning 'God') and עִמָּנוּ (ʻImmānū, meaning 'with us'); Standard Hebrew ʻImmanuʼel, Tiberian Hebrew ʻImmānûʼēl).

Dear God, Fidel Castro has come out with a kind of op-ed piece in the Cuban news organ (think Pravda), Granma.

I refuse to link to that sack of smegma, so here is a blogpost that does.

In this piece, el Comandante-en-barba muses out loud about the possible origins of the name "Rahm Emanuel". Get this -- his first thought was that it appeared Spanish! You know, like Manuel the porter. ¿Qué?

"WHAT a strange surname! It appears Spanish, easy to pronounce, but it’s not. Never in my life have I heard or read about any student or compatriot with that name, among tens of thousands."

...what a diseased, parochial mind, dios mio.

Next he'll be telling us about how funny that he met an Arab girl called Fatima, because he always thought that was Portuguese.



But just so that Chris Matthews gets a tingle up his leg about his thought processes, Castro adds this little gem, remembered from his Jesuit boarding school teachers, no doubt.

"Where does it come from? I wondered. Over and over, the name came to mind of the brilliant German thinker, Immanuel Kant, who together with Aristotle and Plato, formed a trio of philosophers that have most influenced human thinking. Doubtless he was not very far, as I discovered later, from the philosophy of the man closest to the current president of the United States, Barack Obama."

What the bloody hell kind of logic is this?

It reminds me of reading a Woody Allen biography, which mentioned his real name was Allen Konigsberg, immediately segueing that it's no wonder Woody Allen is so interested in philosophy -- because Königsberg was the birthplace of (you guessed it) Immanuel Kant!

Castro wasn't done.

Not only did he use his squirelly logical skills to make snide inferences about the forthcoming American implosion, but he actually had the gall to reference Kant's aphorisms.

"Of course, it was not the only objective or the only inspiring idea, but what is certain is that after the triumph of the revolution in our homeland on January 1, 1959, I still recalled some of the German philosopher’s aphorisms:

“A wise man can change his mind. A stubborn one, never.”

“Do not use others as a means to your end.”

“Only through education can a man finally be a man.”

Ain't that funny, Fifo!

Especially since you're stubborn as the muck stuck to the sole of one's foot; you've used everyone and I do mean EVERYONE to get and keep yourself in power for 50 years; and you deny your people the basic human right to have an education.

Oh, don't tell me that because your educational system is free, that it's worthy, because that's another slap to our faces. When your own people cannot go into a library and check out non-approved literature, have no access to the internet unless they are higher-ups in the government, and have to samizdat their way to enlightenment, that is no education worth speaking of.

Hipocrita. Viejo chocho. Caso perdido!

Keep your thoughts to yourself next time, why don't you.

Related

Reflections From The Twilight Zone
Rahm Emanuel Is Driving Fidel Castro Crazy
From The Department Of Delirium

Bedsheets And Purebreds

I think PETA have finally lost it. They staged a protest outside the Westminister Dog Show wearing white KKK robes, likening dog breeders to "master race" conscious racists...

Their goal, according to a post on the PETA website, was to draw a parallel between the KKK and the American Kennel Club. "Obviously it's an uncomfortable comparison," PETA spokesman Michael McGraw told the Associated Press.

But the AKC is trying to create a "master race" when it comes to pure-bred dogs, he added. "It's a very apt comparison."

The group passed out brochures implying the Klan and AKC have the goal of "pure bloodlines" in common.

I almost feel like letting this bit of insanity speak for itself, and close the blogpost with it. But let me delve into the topic a bit.

Not everyone who is a PETA supporter leans left politically, but they share a similar mindset with many progressives -- specifically, they take an idea which could at face-value be estimable in intent, and stretch it out to it's most ridiculous conclusion.

It's a plug-and-play logic that is so ridiculous, that it ends up alienating more people than garnering supporters.

E.G.:

They take a notion, such as animal breeders are going for a "master race" (which they are, that's the whole point of the animal kingdom, raw survival by the the fittest exemplars), and then look around for an human equivalent action.

Since they wish to suggest that animals should be given the same legal protections as humans, such as protection from race superiority, they chose the Ku Klux Klan as their imagery -- perhaps a little voice reminding them of Godwin's Law said that's more acceptable than the more "rational" allegory, Nazis. They were the ones who had a Lebensborn programme, not the Klan, morons.

Look, I realise they are doing this for effect to draw attention to their cause, and perhaps they don't really believe Peggy Gero DaValt is the new David Duke. But come on, give me a break.

Like Code Pink, they have a collective screw loose.

Fear Itself

I recently pounced on a peculiar pro-Obama board called, "The Obama Forum".

Let me tell you, it's a doozy of a place. Like discovering Youtube that first time, you can lose yourselves in there for hours.

Any forum which features a section called "OBAMA NATION WATCH ~ Keeping an eye on our enemies" is itching for an Instalanche, or a Hot Air Ballooning (coinage!). At the very least, they should expect horrified readers wondering what on earth they are banging on about.

The thing of it is, The Obama Forum is clearly a parody site. Clearly.

You know why I know that? Apart from the fact that I have a brain, can use it to think, and I didn't fall out of the turnip truck yesterday or even the day before that, it's evident that what they say is done for effect. Think of it like the Onion, only with less carbonated burps.

The question then becomes, who owns the site, and what is their motivation for maintaining it? I can think of a few reasons.

Let's pretend the moderators are Democrats. They could either (a) want to poke fun at other Democrats who take Obama worship too far.

- or -

(b) Hope those not savvy enough to realise it's a parody site, who they believe would invariably be Republicans or those against Obama, would write-up an outraged piece on it. This would lead the anti-Obama crowd to look doubly stupid, and humourless when someone leaked the truth. The Obama Forum folks could then point and snigger at them because they behaved in the expectedly gullible/paranoid way, and much fun would be had at HuffPo by all.

Now let's pretend the moderators are Republicans.

Most people can instantly come up with many more reasons for this version, all invariably narrowing down to "they want to make Obama supporters look bad".

Additionally, they could be apolitical creatures who just want to have a little fun at the expense of all concerned. In other words, jerks with time on their hands.

I think I like that scenario the best, don't you?

By now, if you haven't clicked on the link above to The Obama Forum itself, you are wondering just how egregious their posts could be. Well, even though it's a parody site (I allege), certain incovenient posts have a tendency to fall off the face of the earthscapade, especially when it relates to anything to do with Barack Obama.

So for your convenience, I've made screencaptures of that one particular thread which first caught my eye.

It's called:

"List enemy license plates here"

I want you to click on the images below so you can read them yourselves. On the off-off-off-chance these are real licence plates, I don't want to contribute to their dissemination on Sundries, capiche?

Plus, I've always liked a slow reveal. It's sexier.

THE FORUM SUB-FORA



THE LORD OBAMA AND HIS MINIONS ARE WATCHING YOU!




THREAD MISSION STATEMENT



OMG LULZ!!1! HE KEYED SOME1'S CAR ALREADY



A FREEBIE TWO-FER OF HATE



OH SWEET IRONICAL FORUM ID, AND YES I KNOW IRONICAL ISN'T A WORD, DON'T EMAIL ME



THE MASK BEGINS TO SLIP (Chauffered Mercedes, indeed)



THIS POOR N00B STILL DOESN'T GET IT



IN ANOTHER THREAD, A LITTLE DAYLIGHT OF TRUTH PEEPS OUT



Of course, you could ask why there are very few blogposts exposing this forum, by either gullible righties or appreciative lefties. Good question. I don't know. I did find an article about it on the NoBama blog.

The poor blogger didn't know what to make of the thing.

It could be a parody site…at least, I certainly hope so. If you can stomach it, here’s the link.

The board’s social groups include:

* Black Panther Party (”dedicated to protecting the black race, and the extermination of all whites”),

* Jewish Posters Union (”Any goyim gentiles are not allowed in our group. We are racist because G-d is racist.) ,

* People’s Independence Movement for Progress - P.I.M.P. (”We struggle for the good of all under the principles of Marx, Obama, Mao, Stalin, and Ashley Judd. We plan to lead the U.S.S.A. for the common good of all men, no matter how lazy.)

Dude, get a clue. P.I.M.P. Ashley Judd. 'Nuff said.

Of course, the fact that the owners of this site began it as a parody site, doesn't mean that every one of the 1800 registered users are in on the joke themselves. More than once in a while, you get the sense in a reply that they are down with worshipping Obama.

In a private sub-forum, which is visible briefly to you on registering, you are given the opportunity to learn how to worship the Lord Obama via the:

Temple of Latter Day Universalism ~ A Place Of Worship For OBAMATOLOGISTS

The regulars like to browbeat outraged newbies, most of them Christian, urging them to accept Barack Obama as their saviour.

The Christians in turn claim they have no need for Jesus-Barack; they believe in the real one who died for our sins, who had He lived, would certainly have been a registered Republican, thankyouverymuch.

It's all very amusing to observe these exchanges, in an outer Socratic circle kind of way.

Having exposed this hilarity to you, let me now change gears a bit.

Let me ask any of you out there reading this blogpost if you disagree with me, and think this is a genuine site, and all these outlandish posts are, on the contrary, very real indeed?

Or even better, if you are a Democrat, and had you found a similar forum lavishing praise on Bush (or being patently against Obama), would you automatically think it were real, and it never ever could be a parody?

Because I have news for both sets of people.

You are the kind of person who tends to believe the worst about those who oppose your political beliefs. This makes you weak intellectually, and liable to fall for any hoax, conspiracy theory, or libel out there.

I tend not to think in these terms about those I disagree with, however strongly.

This is why people like me are able to ascertain within a degree of certainty just exactly what is what therefore being less likely to fall prey to these tricks, and look like raving looneys.



My admission is not some pat on the back, even if it may sound it. On the contrary, I am saddened by the need for this ability. For in this day and age, such an ability almost ranks as a gift from God.

The pitfalls, especially for the young or impressionable, are overwhelming at the moment. They are exacerbated on both sides by rank hatred for the opposing viewpoint.

But I have also noticed it doesn't help if you come from or were raised in a closed society, where truth was rarely obtainable, and doubt was your mother's milk. Heck, I too might've come out that way if the Arab street had been my playground. I understand whilst never condoning.

No, the Obama Forum doesn't pass the smell test.

The EightMaps site, on the other hand...well, that's another kettle of fish.



Their goal is to list every address of all the donors who contributed to the anti-Prop 8 campaign in California. Though no one has explicitly given any orders, already there are reports that people are being harassed at their domiciles.

What other outcome could there possibly be, but harassment, repression, or even God forbid, possibly the death of a person targeted by these lunatics?

What other conclusion can there be, other than this group wants to make sure you know your life will be laid bare in future, should you behave the same way again?

Unlike the Obama Forum, the Eightmaps site's intent is crystal clear. That's the one you should fear, and blog about 'til you're blue in the face.

Up and at 'em.

This is no time for giving the benefit of the doubt.

I'll Stop Making Fun Of Obama

When an ex-SNL alum goes on Broadway to lampoon President Obama by, amongst other things, projecting a photo of the presidential penis on the stage.

Don't hold your breath because unlike what occured to ex-President George W. Bush, it just won't happen.

The New York Times via Gateway Pundit:

So far six audience members have stormed out midperformance of the Broadway show “You’re Welcome America. A Final Night with George W Bush,” the comedian Will Ferrell’s lampooning of the 43rd president, according to those keeping count at the Cort Theater. But they haven’t been leaving after a particular Ferrell quip.

They’ve been standing up, instead, after the projection of a supersize photo on the backdrop of the stage. A photo of a penis. Specifically, as Mr. Ferrell (who plays President Bush) leads the audience to believe, the president’s penis. Except that’s not quite right.

“It’s an anonymous but age-appropriate public domain Internet penis,” said Adam McKay, the play’s director. “We went on the Web and got a penis.”

“It’s not the president’s penis, as far as I know [edit: Heh. Heh. Just how would he know?], and Will is 41, so we weren’t going to use his,” Mr. McKay added. “What I do know is that the photo gets one of the great shrieks of delight from the audience, and it’s also the one moment that is followed by people walking out.”

It's not just my sense of lese-majesté horning in. I loved Spitting Image puppets, and howled for hours at the various interpretations of my heroine, Maggie T, and the royals.

When I read in the NYT that the Lebanese had a similar show called "Democracy" (bit vanilla, no? But then, so is "48 Hrs"), which poked gentle fun at the politicians of the day, I clucked approvingly when the show's creator said that everyone is fair game, except the President, since it's against the law to poke fun at the head of government.

Thank God that's not the case in the West, save for ex-Soviet satellites, uncoincidentally enough...

"Mr. Bou-Gedeon becomes grim when asked about the role of comedy, and dramatic art in general, in Lebanon. Only shallow work is possible, he said, because the Lebanese are always trying to escape themselves.

“Shakespeare said, ‘Show a mirror to the people,’ ” he said. “But people do not want to see themselves here. They want an image that is false, not the truth."

No one should be above comedy, especially our leaders. It's a healthy society which can poke fun at those who would rule us. Moreso, when there is absolutely no punishment for doing that.

But with Bush, and with conservatives, it's never gentle, it's never even-handed, it's never even funny -- it's always this side of juvenile, and demented (hello Margaret Cho).

Theirs is no mirror they wish to show us. It's an iron maiden, and yet we're supposed to be both Torquemada and torture victim.

QUICK QUIZ

Is this funny?



How about this?



A) Hellz yeah.
B) How dare you?!

If you answered differently for each, you've got an hypocritical sense of humour.

Look, either both are funny, or none are. You can't have it both ways. That's why some of us are upset -- because you only want it one way. Your way.

Sorry, kids. It's our turn now. Being in opposition is fun.

The Speaker Don't Talk So Good

You know what makes the Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi's claim that "500 million Americans lose their jobs" every month, so intriguing? That it makes your imagination soar in equal portions to your laughter.

A conversation between my porter (a Democrat) and myself.

He: "Hey, does that mean there are 200 million unaccounted for illegal aliens?!"
Me: "Yeah, and every single American, plus the 200 million illegals lose their jobs every month"
He: "Haha. So who's going to pay for the porkulus package?"
Me: "Printing money which will lead to inflation, borrowing from the Chinese, or having your kids pay for it, which will lead to massive unemployment since why work for lesser returns, especially when you can go on the dole and have others pay your way?"
He: "Scary"

Porkulus is a nod to his avid listening of the Rush Limbaugh show. He hates him, but he listens.

Tell me, is there something in the Congress manual given to legislators that makes all of them inflate our country's stats? If it's not the fact that we have 57 States, it's the 500 million Americans in those 57 States. Is this a redistricting ploy? Inquiring minds.

(And why is Nancy Pelosi, so ripe for mocking by the Saturday Night Live crew, with her monitor lizard facelift, and Kitty Carlisle society matron manner, so much a non-factor in their skits?)

Never has the modern leadership in Washington looked like such thin gruel to me.

Obama is no LBJ -- a man who made a career out of brokering backdoor Senate deals before getting into the Oval Office. This went a long way to explain the ease of the passing of his Great Society projects with a similar majority.

And Nancy Pelosi? Well, she's no John McCormack, heck, she's not even Denny Hestert.

No. They're just one mediocrity after another, on both sides. It's bound to catch up to our nation eventually.

"Dr. Strangelove" Or How I Stopped Worrying My Liking Of Palin Was Too Effusive (It's Not Compared To This, Wait 'Til You See It)

Someone explained the phenomenon of "fanfic" to me once.

Enthusiastic fans of a particular show would invent their own stories, whilst the more artistically able of them would even draw their favourite characters in, shall we say, "original poses", sending them on to the actor or actress represented in the picture.

(I remember a friend of mine, who was a big fan of Stargate, or Star Trek or something, telling me about the supposed-ta-be erotic paintings he saw involing Kate Mulgrew and Jeri Ryan. Pass...)

But this, my dear Sundries readers, is on an entirely different dimension altogether. Dan Lacey, the chap whose painting of Palin with three pancakes on her head I once linked to, is at it again.

Here is our President having some kind of relations with an unicorn who has a really messed up hind hoof thingie going on, not to mention, those piercing bedroom eyes.



Strewth! That unicorn is spreading Coppertone on The Prez' back!

...what can one say, eh?

(Check out the coconut with crazy straw. And hey, is that supposedly a pool raft??)

Truther Douchebaggery Entering Our Homes Soon

I rarely watch any television that is not PBS, cable news, Sundance, foreign channels, or the triumverate of Discovery-History Channel-Travel Channel, and perhaps I see why now.

Despite hearing that America is going through a second "Golden Age of Television" exactly 50 years after its first, if segments like this on FX's "Rescue Me" are anything to go by, I am not missing a thing.

A coming episode of the acclaimed FX drama “Rescue Me” will tackle what may sound like a far-fetched plot line: that the attacks of Sept. 11 were an “inside job.” The actor who espouses the theories on camera, it turns out, also subscribes to them in real life.

Claims that Al Qaeda terrorists were not solely responsible for the attacks have a lively following on the Internet, including on YouTube, but the second episode of “Rescue Me’s” fifth season, starting in April, may represent the first fictional presentation of 9/11 conspiracy theories by a mainstream media company (FX is operated by the News Corporation).

“They’re not discussed a lot in the press,” Daniel Sunjata, the actor who plays Franco Rivera on “Rescue Me,” told reporters at a television press tour last month. He predicted that the episode would be “socio-politically provocative.”

Ugh. I wonder if "Rescue Me" would ever tackle the Holocaust suggesting it never happened. Of course not (thank God). And why? Because there are some conspiracy theories more acceptable than others.

As for the topic, let me reiterate that there is nothing, and I do mean nothing, that makes my hair stand on end more than people who believe in conspiracy theories. It alters my entire view of a person's intelligence. This actually affected my enjoyment of Marion Cotillard's wonderful performance as Edith Piaf, in last year's "La Vie En Rose".

Yep, she's a Truther, too.

Cotillard: I have a tendency to often share the point of view of the conspiracy theory. [...]

Coluche, 9/11, all that. We can watch on the Internet all the films that, well…about 9/11, about — about the conspiracy theory. It's fascinating. It's even addictive after a while.

Paris Première: Let's take 9/11, for example. What did disturb [sic] you more concretely?

Cotillard: You are shown that other towers of the same kind that were hit by planes, that burnt — there is a tower, I think that it's in Spain, that burnt for twenty-four hours.

Paris Première: Before collapsing…?

Cotillard: It never collapsed! None of these towers collapsed. And, over there, in a few minutes, the thing collapses. And, then, after that, we'll talk lengthily about it because there was — because the thing was filled with gold, the towers from 9/11. And then it was a money-sucker because they were finished, it seems to me, in '73, and to update all that, to modernize all the technology and everything, it was much more expensive to have work done, etc., than destroying them. Did man walk on the moon? I've seen quite a lot of documentaries about it, and I ask myself. But, in any case, I don’t believe everything that I'm told, that's for sure.

I've already spoken at length about conspiracy theories. Though upon reading this excerpt by Cotillard (who later apologised for her remarks, saying they were taken out of context), I am again jolted back into the theory I have about why certain people believe in them.

It's not a logic thing. It's also not that there has never been a single conspiratorial act in the history of mankind, and therefore, they're all bunk.

It's that conspiracy theories are twisted creatures of the human ego.

Listen to what conspiracists always, always say when justifying their beliefs.

But, in any case, I don’t believe everything that I'm told, that's for sure.

Commit that sentence to memory. It is used by every person who has ever wanted to explain how the world works according to their world view.

What they are really saying is this:

The whole world might be made of gullible morons who believe in everything they are told, BUT! I! AM! SMARTER! THAN! THEY! ARE!

"They" - another they - cannot pull the wool over MY eyes!

... whomever "they" think it is, though I suspect the they is more The System than an actual cadre of people.

Having said that, I think it goes again to my theory of the ego being stimulated by such thoughts. It is very easy for people to imagine that there is a puppetmaster inside a smoke-filled room pulling the strings of our world, sending his minions to do his evil bidding.

Never mind that the total sum of our world's actions cannot be conceived by any single human being, let alone one person or select group being able to control such an organic growth as an open society. In their hearts, they are comforted by their view of how the world works, at the same time continuing to be appalled by misanthropic visions, which is the root of their attitude.

They do not trust their fellow human beings, especially those who they disagree with politically.

The other way would actually entail putting away their half-gassed fabrications; to approach the world as a mature, mentally healthy adult -- and some people die of old age believing in Machiavellian blueprints.

Look, conspiracy theories exist only because we have doubts. The doubts are legitimate, but the conclusions are a panacea for ignorance.

RELATED LINK: Pithy and always intellectually stimulating Blake of The Bit Maelstom coincidentally touches on the very topic of conspiracy theories, of which he was working on posting for a while.

He writes about the current and past crops of conspiracies, from the moon landing (debunked by Adam and Jamie, thanks be to God -- I'm only being half-facetious when saying that) to the JFK assassination to Obama's "mysterious" birthplace.

Blake's gambit is to try to shame the conspiracists for the inane quality of recent theories.

The 9/11 Truthers have instead constructed an elaborate explanation for the towers' collapse which insults everyone who saw the planes hit.

Worse, they do so in the face of an actual conspiracy: Of anti-American hard-line Muslim terrorists who left massive paper trails, who had ties all over the world, who had many co-conspirators, and who had a boss willing to take credit for it.

On a lighter note, another dumb conspiracy making the rounds is the "Obama wasn't born in America" theory. This requires us to believe that the State of Hawaii is hiding something (apparently in a many-decade anticipation of Obama's eventual Presidential bid) and that there's not a single Republican or Hillary supporter able to sneak that evidence out.

Really, it's just not up to snuff.

I hope to see better in the future from everyone.

Heh.

I only wish I could be this light-hearted about the topic, tweaking their noses like Blake does.

Unfortunately, it really cheeses my left non-existent nut to have to speak about such things. I think it is the educator and the Historian in me, which balks at the grains of truth being used to insinuate concrete fact.

We have the French Revolution to blame for every cockamamie conspiracy that has been flung out since the world exploded into modernity in the late 1700s. People who didn't know how to explain how the world suddenly looked back at them, needed to find reasons in the form of groups (the Jews, the Jacobins, the Jesuits, the Masons) to make sense of a topsy-turvy era.

The world has never really recovered since.

SUGGESTED VIEWING: If you haven't already done so, check out Fritz Lang's silent film, "Spies" (Spione).

It's a treasure trove of insinuations about how the world works, down to the creepy banker (so obviously intended to suggest "a grasping, devious Jew" with his neurotic Lenin goatee and Dr. Evil sidekick cat) who masterminds a spy ring.



I always wondered about this film, which despite the love of intrigue and sense of helplessness Lang loved to show in his films, was uncharacteristically lazy intellectually.

Then I remembered that Thea von Harbou, Lang's then wife, was later one of the top artist prizes secured by a grateful Hitler to show the world that, hey, intellectuals were amenable to National Socialism.

To quote the outraged Headmistress in another Weimar classic, "Mädchen in Uniform", ein Skandal.

The Desperate Tempest

New lads! Our wars are done.
The desperate tempest hath so bang'd the Turks
That their designment halts... - Othello

Oh no! George Obama, the youngest half-brother of our current President, has been rung up on drug charges -- namely, being in possession of cannabis. It's apparently known in Kenya as "Bhang".

This rings a bell. There is a drink known as "Bhang-Lassi", the latter of which (Lassi) is a great favourite Indian drink of mine. It's like milky yoghurt, and a must-drink when having spicey curry. It's the one thing I miss about Indian take-aways.

But back to poor George. I had written about him earlier, chastising then Senator Obama about not even offering a helping hand to his brother, despite his political credo of being his brother's keeper.

"This handsome, dignified young man who is the spitting image of him, is Senator Obama's half-brother George.



He lives in utter poverty in a Nairobi slum. His yearly earnings are a whole U$12. I remember seeing his life story on CNN, and being aghast at just how much he admires his brother, reads his book for inspiration, and yet feels no bitterness towards him for not reaching out to help him. George looks like the type who might be too proud to accept the help, but can't Obama at least TRY?

I mean, my God, even I sponsored a South American kid from one those Sally Struthers-like programmes a few years ago. Why can't Senator Obama help his little brother out?"

Apparently, he was one of the few Kenyan relatives President Obama didn't invite to his inauguration.

(In fact, did anyone hear about them being there? I didn't. There is such a media silence on that -- Muslim -- side of his background, that it shouldn't astonish us anymore, even if it does anyway)

On looking at the photograph above, which appeared in today's CNN article on the arrest, I see now that his eyes are clearly in need of a little post-weed Visine.

I'm not being facetious.

I was actually rather affected by George when I saw that reportage on cable. His manner is like his half-brother, Barack, even to the slight standoffishness, and touchiness when questioned about his life.

"I was brought up well. I live well even now," he said. "The magazines, they have exaggerated everything."

I think I kind of like it here. There are some challenges, but maybe it is just like where you come from, there are the same challenges," Obama said.

In that one quote of his, you can see that he is at pains to convey he comes from a good background, that people have got it all wrong about him, and that oh by the way, he needs no one's pity since where he lives currently is a choice, not borne out of dire poverty.

Any person can see that he is in a world of hurt; his response is full of face-saving bluster -- but said with such quiet dignity, all conveyed via his proud eyes, that you just want to reach out and hug the guy.

It's telling. I have never had the slightest desire to hug Barack Obama, as he inspires in me not the least tenderness. No, not even when he had streaming tears down his cheeks at a campaign stop the day after his grandmother passed on. But George? My heart plays motherly tricks on me, whenever I think about him.

It's a funny ol' life, innit?

But for merest chance, two men who share the same father would've shared similar fates.

Yet, one was blessed beyond imagination in having been born to an American mother, whereas the other was left an orphan at the age of 6 months by a father who wrapped himself around a tree with his car -- yet another ex-colonial government official drunkard, whose lives were spent populating the bars of Nairobi, nursing Johnnie Walker and grudges.

Today, one man is the world's most powerful man, and the other one more Kenyan lad smoking his worries away with Bhang he can ill-afford. The worst part of it, he seems lost and utterly alone in his predicament.

Hey, Mr. President. We know you want to spend almost a trillion dollars in America. But can you spare a dime in Kenya?

Blago-A-GoGo

And so ends another corruptocrat's career, as the Illinois Senate sent Governor Milorad "Rod" Blagojevich packing. After the strange defense he put up for himself Thursday, saying he did what he did for the kids and senior citizens, it seems he is more than just a corrupt politician -- he's a sociopath who cannot differentiate between right and wrong, let alone the hard truth of reality.

As such, it's difficult not to pile on when the man is down. He doesn't deserve anyone's confidence, after bartering sick children's hospital programmes in exchange for favours. I mean even for a "Chicago politician" that is COLD.

Door Number 3

Dan Riehl echoes what all of us were thinking about George HW Bush's joke below.

"I suspect only a very old man can get away with saying this about an obvious feminist."

President Bush (who thankfully looks much more hale and hearty than he did at the recent Inauguration, seen visibly leaning on his cane due to hip problems) told an amazed audience of his encounter with what all of us know is one of those zombified, vampirical, Golemish, pro-choice protestors.

As luck would have it, I think I have tracked down some photographs no doubt showing the very woman "41" must've seen!

But my eyes are not what they used to be, so I am enlisting the help of all Sundries readers. Tell me who you think is the lady President Bush clearly saw during that fateful encounter.

VOTE NOW. Was it...?

(A)




(B)



(C)




Or...

(EXTRA SPECIAL CHOICE)

Danger! Danger! Do not Click at Work! ...or whilst eating, and yeah, I don't know if that middle one is a woman or a man either